Date #1 Ashley

I met Ashley through a mutual friend; we exchanged numbers and I gave her a call Sunday evening. The conversation went well, but then again that part always does. My phone almost died during the conversation; that kinda happens when you go on talking for 3 hrs. The topics were pretty general ranging from college, work, goals, and what kind of interests we both had. We end the conversation making plans for Wednesday. I felt pretty happy about the whole thing.

The next morning, I woke up to a nice surprise text message saying "Good Morning Doll. You're a really great guy." Now I am a little stoked and my ego is moving up in the world. So, I try to be cool about it, and more reserved than normal, and I respond with "Morning, thanks, you're pretty cool too." She ends up texting me during the day and making small talk. As the conversation continues she starts hitting on me pretty strongly. So I am thinking “Wow, This is looking like it could go somewhere.” She shifts gears on me again and decides that she wants to see me tonight rather than wait till Wednesday. I had no really important plans, so I said ok...

I saw plenty of signs that this could be very bad or very good; but who listens to that little voice? So, I went. I arrived at her place around 9. She let me in and we went into the kitchen. As she turned to ask me if I wanted something to drink, I kissed her. Why you ask? Because this girl was teasing me all day long and following the kiss, I responded with "now we are even". We sat and chatted on the couch for a few and she offered me a beer. We went down to the Bar/Game room area where a 50 or 60 inch TV sat. We grab our beer and sit down on the couch where she tries to figure out the remote and eventually gives up. We talk for a while longer then the kissing starts again. She kissed me different than I am used to. I am not complaining at all about this but, she was kinda nipping my lip while she was kissing me and it was new. There was no way I was gonna try that back though, being that I probably would of done it too hard and ended up taking a chunk out of her lip or something. I really didn’t want to explain that to an emergency room... So within moments she is on top of me kissing…and I am not arguing.

I get some air and change the subject to food - yeah calm the conversation down a little. She had made some chicken nuggets while I was driving over. So, I have chicken nuggets in one hand and a beer in the other while I am sitting on a couch watching Jaws chew on a fish. So as we are talking she is complaining about being hot. And of course, I say something cheesy. “Yes I can see that..." She apparently does not like compliments. Well you know what, I can count more girls in my life who cannot take a compliment than those who can… and do you know how strange that is? It really tempts me to just go around saying, "Hey chick, you look fat in those jeans today” or “yeah you know that shirt your wearing, well it makes people stare at you in ways that make you look like you’re the biggest triple grade A steak that they have ever seen.” Anyone ever try this? If you do, not on my advice, let me know how it turns out!

So eventually she decides we should go into the pool. Of course I never planned on getting into a pool on the way over but, she is already stripped down to a bra and panties. So I do what any normal guy age 16 and up that has enough confidence and ego to do and I strip down to my Family Guy boxers. She realizes that we need towels. I say, "I would offer to go but I have no idea where to look". She goes back inside and I start testing the water. I am about knee deep when she calls me back to the house. I come back in and ask her what’s up and she says, "A bug came in, it’s huge, and I cannot find it to kill it". I look around the house from where I am standing and then turn on the kitchen light to see if I can locate the bug. She says, "I don’t think I wanna swim anymore." I, of course, offer to go get our clothes. I come back in and she is gone. I hear her call me from downstairs, "bring them down here". I bring the clothes down and drop them on the table. She comes out of a side room, giving that look that basically says... “Oh. It is on!”

Shortly after the deed had commenced, she freaks out, pushes me back, and says “Do you want me to finish you? Did you finish already?” Not only am I shocked to hear a woman say this, but it’s only been 2 minutes. Before I can even answer she bolts for the bathroom and disappears for a few minutes. I cannot help but laugh to myself quietly. Then she comes out looking all distraught and telling me, “I thought I wanted to do it, but after I got it, I realized I really didn’t." I, at this point have no idea what to say, she is Ms Prim and Proper one second and Ms Porn Star another. I don’t know which side I am dealing with at this point so I put my clothes back on as she apologizes for me not “finishing” and asking me if I was hurting. Then she proceeds to explain to me how she does not even know my last name. Without thinking I say, "That is ok, you couldn’t pronounce it anyway". Giving in, I tell her my last name and she looks at me confused for a second. After that weird moment of silence, she decides to tell me we need to slow down because we skipped some steps... Now to be honest, I was 50/50 on whether to feel bad or just write this off as a line; so I do the manly thing and say that I am completely ok with it. Being that, I am really wanting something more anyway, I can handle it

Replaying this scenario in my head, I am torn. Don’t get me wrong, I am ok with slowing down, but confused on what the right way to have handled this situation would have been. I got a few opinions from my friends on the female side of the house and just about everyone one of them is super model material. Yes being the nice guy has its advantages; but it is like being in car dealership with all Ferrari's; you can look but no TOUCHY! This is where I came to an intersection I was not sure of. If a woman throws herself at you almost completely naked and you do not go for it, you would think she would be embarrassed and rejected and that you’ve killed your chances of anything happening with her in the future. On the other hand, if you do go through with it, then she’ll feel like you will not respect her as a person. I am going to give you some advice. I may not seem like the best person for it, but remember this is coming from a romantic - CARPE DIEM! You only live once, so if you get the chance to do something that you want to, do not pass it up. If you want to ask a girl or guy out, just do it. If you get a chance to kiss and make out or do the deed, (of course with practicing safe sex) just do it. Live life to fullest; if it does not work out, so what? But do not go on with your life saying what if, or regretting a decision.

So with my train wreck of date at its end, and this all took place in just under 2 hrs, I went home laughing and saying to myself, “Yeah, I saw that coming.”